Episode 33: Suicide Notes

Before reading this page, if you are wondering if you should read this section, you probably should.
=== ''Note: The information provided on this page and on this site is provided "as is" without any guarantee of accurancy, or any warranty. All information given is for educational and informative purposes only and are not medical advice, nor are they guaranteed to be written by medical professionals or by people who are as informed as medical officials, and should not be taken as such.'' === For immediate emerencies call 9-1-1 or 9-9-9 as the case may be.

How to tell if you should call a suicide hotline
If you have a plan that you have not enacted but could enact with minimum effort, or have a plan that you have taken concrete steps toward, please call one of these numbers. If you read that last sentence and were wishing it'd mention something it didn't, then call anyway. Even if you read those last two sentences and don't think they're about you, but wish they were: THEY ARE (in a general sense of course (and please call)). They're very honest with you about who they are, what they're there for, and they can legitimately help you. You aren't stupid for needing help.

USA:National Suicide Prevention Life1-800-273-TALK

UK:Samaritans08457 909090

Republic of Ireland:Samaritans116123

Australia: Lifeline13 11 14

Broadcast
Between 14/04/2012 and 18/04/2012

Programme subject
If you skipped past that header at the top, please go take a second to read it. I might throw another one of these sentences in an obvious place to trip you up, so you might as well: it can only save you time if that's the game. Ok, now back to your regularly scheduled article.

The boys stumble through a serious of easily available and probably not all that real suicide notes, mocking the disturbed people's syntax, religious beliefs and perceived regional or socioeconomic status. All in a really fun, light way. Hitler's so-called suicide note is deconstructed (a bit) and the hope is expressed gthat he is in hell. Kurt Cobain's death is given little in the way of sceptical treatment, as if there's no game in town apart from suicide. Come on lads, that story needs revisiting.

Sources and further reading
Foot binding

Suicide notes generally

PhD thesis on the syntax of suicide notes

Etymology of "cuckoo-bananas"

Christine Chubbuck - on-air suicide

Kurt Cobain's suicide note (scan)

Hitler's "suicide note"

Why suicide is stupid

Comedy characters featured
"Hong Kong" Henry Zebrowski

Henry's featured dubious and/or racist impressions
"Hong Kong" Henry Zebrowski

Foodstuffs and beverages mentioned
Ben's non-weed nugget story

Classic catchphrases
"Don't shoot...get the gun get the gun get the gun."